Drew's Blog: A Purchase

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March 31, 2005

A Purchase

Rob and Catherine are in a very different stage of life than I. They're married. Catherine has a job she likes and Rob is approaching the end of law school. They are the kind of people who can care for not one but two cats with only occasional need for emergency surgery.

Whenever I leave their house, I feel a little inadequate seeing as most of my long term relationships involve not another person, but a substantial quantity of alcohol or perhaps, a phalanx of short lived mice.

Still, they instill in me the hope that I too may have my life in control, at least in the view of a casual observer. As such, following in their footsteps, I recently purchased a label maker.

Rob and Catherine have developed a rather extensive filing system using the label maker. Looking for last years tax return? Filed. A map of the local state park? Filed. A particularly humorous cartoon from the New Yorker? Yep, it's in there.

I ordered mine, the Brother PT-65, from Amazon, and today it arrived. It was everything I hoped it would be.

Only a few minutes out of the box, the label maker was now helpfully labeled, "Label Maker" I understood immediately that this was perhaps contrary to the purpose of purchasing the machine, and so with only ten minutes of hard work, I managed to clarify what in the living room constituted the "Television," "Coffee Table," "Wall," and "Cat." When Kate ("Roommate") threatened to retaliate by labeling my mice ("Cat Food") I retreated to my clearly marked "Bedroom" and turned to my fresh pile of manila folders.

"Beer Labels" seemed like a good place to start, and, attesting to the usefulness of the organizational process, the mere act of making such a label reminded me of how long it had been since I had added to the collection -- literally hours. I took the opportunity to add another few samples. Next was "Dirty Limericks" and "Frisby, Pictures Of." I had just labeled my feet "Left" and "Right," my cup of "Tea, Hot," and the folder for "Manila Folders, Blank," when the machine ran out of tape. Apparently, the roll included was only a sample to make a tiny number of labels.

I spent the next hour and a half staring at the empty spool and wishing, beyond hope, that I had taken the opportunity to label this, useless though it now was, the inevitable remains of a misplaced enthusiasm for maturity.

Posted by Drew at March 31, 2005 01:33 PM

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Comments

Honey, you clearly just need to label yourself "Sexy Pants" and then make your way out into the big wide world.

(Did you get metallic tape for the label maker?? If not, you should consider it. It's preeeetty, not that I would know anything about that, of course)

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March 31, 2005

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